Gift Giving Etiquette

This is the time of the year when invitations begin to arrive in mailboxes across the country. As we start to see our calendars filling up, dollar signs flash before our eyes reminding us of all the gifts we will have to buy.

We often wonder what the exact etiquette is for these gifts we will be giving. Here are a few tips to help you through this wedding season...

1. How much should you spend?

• There is a myth that you should spend as much as the couple is paying per guest for the reception. The cost of a gift should be dependent on your relationship with the couple, the closer you are to them the more you should spend. But in no case should you feel obligated to spend more than you can afford. Whether you spend $10 or $1,000 the couple should be thankful for your gift.
  

2. Are you obligated to send or bring a gift?

• If you have received a formal invitation to a wedding, it carries with it an obligation to send a gift, whether you are able to attend or not. You may either deliver gifts in person before the wedding day or on the wedding day to the reception, or send them ahead of time. Traditionally, if sending the gift ahead of time, it should be sent to the bride's parents home addressed to the bride.
• Gifts may be sent as soon as you receive your invitation. For your convenience most stores offer delivery to the recipient.

3. Can I give a gift of cash?

• Yes, cash is always an acceptable gift. Although, it is not good etiquette for the couple to tell guests ahead of time that they would prefer cash. Checks are also quite common; if you are writing a check make it out to the bride under her maiden name if before the wedding and made out to the couple if after.
  

4. Should I purchase off of a registry?

• My answer to this is always yes. A couple registers for gifts to ensure that they receive the items they want and need for their new life together. If you are feeling creative and know the couple well enough, you may purchase something not registered for; but please include a receipt in case they want to return or exchange it. Often times, I personally will purchase from the registry and then add a little personal touch by buying the couple something fun to go along with the other gift but always staying with the same theme (kitchen, bath, camping, etc.)